God,
Dog and Beelzebub
God
Chapter
One
I
am God
Chapter
Two
Yes, God.
Chapter
Three
God, God, God.
Chapter
Four
Yippee, I'm God!!
Chapter
Five
It’s good being God…
Chapter
Six
The Be All and End All…
Chapter
Seven
The Alpha and the Omega…
Chapter
Eight
…and the happy ever after.
Chapter
Nine
Love me, worship me, and above all - fear me.
Signed: God (that’s with a capital G).
DOG
Chapter
One
I am a dog (that’s god spelt backwards).
Chapter
Two
Yes, that's dog.
Chapter
Three
Dog, dog, dog
Chapter
Four
Woof!
Chapter
Five
It’s good being a dog…
Chapter
Six
I can bark whenever I want to…
Chapter
Seven
I can play whenever I want to…
Chapter
Eight
And I can do nothing, if I so want to.
Chapter
Nine
It’s really grand, being a dog.
Oh,
I have just seen next-door’s cat, so I must dash.
(It’s about time she had a good scare!)
Signed: dog (with a small d, that is).
Beelzebub
Chapter
One
Devil, Satan, blackguard, daemon, daimon, demon, deuce, dickens, evil
spirit,
fiend, heller, hellion, monster, ogre, rogue, villain. Depending
on your particular
beliefs, you may think that I am all, some or perhaps
even none of these things.
Chapter
Two
To have any hope of understanding who I am, you will need to cast your
mind back
to when I was first created, and by whom...
Chapter Three
God created me, like you, in his own image, and also like you I was
made flawed,
capable of doing wrong if I so chose. However, unlike humankind,
whom God saw
fit to give another chance, after Adam and Eve defied him
when they ate from the
Tree of Knowledge, I was cast out from Heaven,
with no hope of redemption –
ever! It seems to me that in God’s
divine order, humans are his favourites, and only
humans worthy enough
of a second chance.
Chapter
Four
Am I bitter? That’s a good question, a question that I have pondered
over for many
a millennium, and, if I am perfectly honest, I do have
to admit that I was insufferably
bitter at first. Having said that,
and with the passing of so many years, I have come
to see my expulsion
from Heaven as a help rather than a hindrance, for it has put
me in
a unique position to see Creation through the eyes of an outsider, removed
from all that distracting worshipping business.
Chapter Five
Religion is no democracy! ‘What?’ I can hear you all say
in sheer disbelief. You
don’t agree with me? Think about it, my
friend, has anyone in your religion ever
asked for your opinion of what
you think of its doctrine, of the dogma you have
been subjected to since
you were a mere infant? How do you think they might
react if you were
to suddenly question it? Branded! You would be branded a
troublemaker,
for having dared to question the rules and regulations thought up to
keep you and the worshipping masses in place, by those who wish to the
control
your very thoughts. No. Religion is no democracy; it’s
more akin to Communism,
where you are told what to do, and you do it
without question.
Chapter Six
Have you ever wondered why so many people are drifting away from religion?
I’ll
tell you why. And it’s not because of some silly outdated
notion that I am constantly
egging them on with my pitchfork, to spite
God. The reason why so many people
are leaving is because they have
awoken, they have awoken to the lies, the
missive of disinformation
that has been fed to them, for generations.
While people were uneducated, knowing no better, this worked and they
believed
without question everything they were told, but in this enlightened
age of the
internet, with instant communication and sharing of knowledge,
where questions
and answers can be relayed from one side of the world
to the other in a matter of
seconds, it was only a matter of time until
this shift in thinking occurred. This shift is
only the beginning, the
greatest changes are yet to come…
Chapter
Seven
Gloating. Do you think I am gloating when I see these fundamental changes
in
mankind’s thinking occur? Well let me tell you, I am not. And
I will tell you
something more; I have never wanted to do anything other
than speak the truth.
Confused? Let me explain… Pride. You have
been told that I was expelled from
Heaven because of the sin of pride….
Think about it, have you ever heard anything
more absurd? If it were
true, then just about everyone on Earth would have been
expelled by
now. No, I was not expelled for the sin of pride…
Chapter Eight
Jealousy. I was expelled from Heaven, because God, seeing my openness,
my
honesty and my truthfulness, was jealous that something he had created
might
have a characteristic that he himself was so fundamentally lacking.
I was expelled from Heaven because God was jealous of me!
Chapter Nine
Left. Did you know that the word ‘left’ is actually Latin
for evil?
Where do you think that idea originated?
The left-hand side of the brain is used for artistic, creative and freethinking
purposes, what better reason can you think for religion to label it
as evil?
Chapter Ten
What will happen if these changes continue unabated? Honesty? Transparency?
Understanding? Forgiveness? All these, and more, will come to pass when
I am
exonerated. Now, don’t you think that’s something worth
fighting for?
I
am in no hurry. I know that it will take time, but in the end I will
be proven right. And
when this finally happens, I will take my place
in the Heavens, not as a God, but as
an inspiration to all souls –
everywhere!
Signed: Beelzebub
(with a capital 'P' for patient).
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©
Gerrard T Wilson 2008
